Why your clients expect everything right now and how to fix it
Let’s talk about the thing every business owner struggles with…Your entire job is to make someone else’s life easier through a product or service you provide, but you also started a business to live your best life…
So HOW do you make sure to deliver 5-star service without making your life harder in the process.
I’m so glad you asked, let me tell you…
BOUNDARIES!
Boundaries are the reason you can keep doing this work without burning out, resenting your clients or running away to live in the woods.
Why boundaries matter more than you think
People love to talk about systems, productivity and workflow (me, I am people).
But your systems don’t matter without boundaries. It may seem backwards, but YOUR boundaries will actually help you deliver better service to your clients!
Which version of you is going to deliver your best work:
Rested, clear headed and ready for a challenge
Exhausted, stretched thin and holding on through caffeine
Seems obvious, yet people still struggle.
Your clients aren’t the problem
Most of your clients have never experienced clear, healthy boundaries in their life… especially from their service providers.
“The client is always right” motto has created monsters…
BUT your clients aren’t always the problem… sometimes they just don’t know any better.
Since they haven’t experienced boundaries… everything feels urgent, important and like it needs a response RIGHT NOW. The reason it feels urgent? Because that’s just how it’s always been.
You need to train them, by setting boundaries, communicating those boundaries and then following through with those boundaries.
Common stressors that can be fixed by boundaries
When clients leave things to the last minute and expect it to become your priority
When clients send “quick requests” that are never actually quick
When clients change direction halfway through and still expect the same timeline
When clients drop work on you with zero context and expect you to figure it out
When clients message at all hours and assume you’re available
When clients treat everything like it’s urgent, even when it’s not
When clients don’t send what you need, then ask why it’s not done
When clients expect instant responses because they just thought of it
Repeat after me… you let them get away with this… this is your fault.
You can’t control what your client does, but you can control how you respond.
This is where boundaries come in.
Working hours
Turnaround times
Saying no
Clear contracts
Preferred communication methods
These aren’t “nice to have” things, they are what helps you be in control of your day-to-day life.
What boundaries look like for me
Let’s take a look at some actual examples so you can see what I’m talking about and what it looks like in daily life.
Boundary 1: The Twin Experiment
Siobhan and I talk all day, every day. We’re identical twins, so that’s not surprising.
There’s a constant stream of messages, voice notes, random thoughts, updates about life. It never really stops and likely never will.
Why am I telling you this? Well because she also works at TVA PTBO and if we don’t handle it properly, it could become messy… fast.
We have a clear personal vs work boundary with supports in place to help:
We try to keep all work convos in Slack, which is where all other TVA PTBO work chat happens
If work spills over to other channels (it happens) we communicate “My brain isn’t in work mode yet” or “I’m out of work mode for the day” and immediately respect each other - no exceptions
If we have a work disagreement or personal disagreement - it never impacts the other. We take time to regroup and move on.
Simple.
No pushing, no sneaky “quick question”, and no blurring the lines. Just a clear boundary that protects both of us.
I don’t work evenings and I don’t work weekends. Siobhan sometimes will since she has a day job and kids, but my boundary is always respected without it being a whole conversation every time.
Just because we’re always talking doesn’t mean we’re always working.
We get to have a real relationship outside of business, and still switch into getting sh!t done when it’s time.
Boundary 2: Keeping friendship and work separate
This one is very similar to the twin experience but with my clients.
What I do is so personal that I become friends with my clients, it’s almost impossible to avoid. So having proper boundaries is crucial.
How I handle this is very similar to the twin thing…
Separate personal & business chats. For a number of clients I have 2 Whatsapp conversations, both involve just me and my client but one is just the normal 1:1 chat and 1 is a group with their business name. The business chat is always muted and the personal chat is not.
My clients know I don’t work evenings and weekends so like Siobhan, if they’re working on the weekend, they’ll email me knowing I have my notifications off and it won’t bug me.
They know that work Olivia will ignore them if they send work stuff outside of work hours but that friend Olivia is always there. On the flip side, if I’m working when I know they’re not, I follow the same rules.
Even though we chat in Whatsapp, they know not to send me any requests in Whatsapp. I can’t set a reminder, or flag it or leave it as unread (the bold unread would drive me nuts) so they use email or Slack and keep Whatsapp for chatting.
Other boundaries
I obviously have other boundaries that aren’t connected to personal relationships that everyone follows:
I don’t work evenings or weekends, so if you ask for something after hours, you’re waiting because I haven’t seen the request!
When a client requests something, I ask when they need it, to make sure I can deliver it on time. If I can’t, I’ll tell them no, and they accept that.
I can’t guarantee I can do something at the last minute. You’re not my only client so if you need something in 1 hour and I’m Zoom producing, too bad.
If they’re late for a meeting, I’m still leaving on time because I have other things to do.
I charge hourly so I ask clients when they’d like to be updated on timing so there are no surprises. If a client is close to their cap, I make sure to tell them before just jumping in.
How to actually set boundaries
It doesn’t have to be complicated. Here’s some quick steps to set boundaries:
1. Decide what your boundaries actually are
As I already mentioned, I don’t work evenings and weekends, but you may. So your boundary may be that you don’t have office hours and that you only check emails at certain times. Or maybe it’s that you do not respond to any instant messaging only emails.
Think about the things that clients do that make your skin crawl, and set boundaries around that.
2. Communicate them directly
A boundary doesn’t matter if no one knows they exist. I communicate how I work at the very beginning of a client relationship, but you can communicate with them any time. I usually communicate verbally the 1st time or in writing if it happens later in the relationship.
3. Follow them
The fastest way to make sure your boundaries are undone is to break them yourself. If you tell your client “I don’t work after hours” and then reply to their email at 8pm, you’re telling them that’s ok. Schedule the email for the next day.
4. Reinforce them when they’re tested
People are humans. They make mistakes and don’t always remember all the rules. Don’t get upset with them, just remind them of your boundaries.
Ok no problem, just signing out for the day, I’ll take a look tomorrow.
I can’t get this done by end of day today as I have calls, I can get it done tomorrow afternoon, let me know if that works.
No, I didn’t see your request because I leave my desk at 4pm. Reminder, I don’t guarantee same day turn around.
Reminder, this is friend Olivia’s chat, please send work related messages to work Olivia’s chat.
If it’s a time-based boundary (like they send a chat message on the weekend) DO NOT RESPOND until you’re working and remind them “If you need something over the weekend, please email me so I see it when I’m at my desk Monday”
5. Adjust them if needed (and then re-communicate them)
Sh!t happens. The boundary you set last year might not work anymore… it’s ok to change it and communicate it.
TL;DR - The summary of all the things I said
Running a business shouldn’t feel like you are constantly reacting to everything around you, but that’s exactly what happens when boundaries are missing.
Everything starts to feel urgent, every request feels like it needs your attention right now and your day gets shaped by whoever asks for something last, instead of what actually matters.
That’s not because your clients are difficult (most times), it’s because there’s no clear structure guiding how and when work happens.
Boundaries help set expectations around your time, your availability and how work gets done.
They make timelines more predictable, reduce unnecessary back and forth, and give you space to focus on the work itself instead of constantly managing requests.
Without boundaries, you’re always catching up. With them, you’re actually in control of your business.
If things feel chaotic, unpredictable or harder than they should be, it’s worth taking a step back and asking what boundaries are missing.
